(In)Sincerest Apologies

This weekend was....out of control. A fantabulous weekend, but crazy none the less. Friday.......tequila shots. Woooow...a whole host of bad ideas. So here goes...

A. Sorry Mr. Person-Who-Lives-Next-To-The-Park- We are very, very sorry we were drunk and were trying to swing. I realize now that it is loud and you probably don't want to hear that at night...errrr...3 in the morning. Sorry. However....you're a douche. 100% tossbag. We were trying to be respectful...well, okay. So maybe I fell off a swing and was having difficulty monitoring the others. But still. We were leaving. So bugger off. 

B. Sorry ducks. Sorry we woke you up. Sorry we disturbed the peace of your lagoon so late at night. Sorry we tried to chase you. We only wanted to be friends....and maybe try to teach you to fight crime. Sorry we chased you onto that rock and you all had to cluster on it. Sorry we tried to sic the turtle on you. I guess you guys are tight or something, he wasn't into it. Sorry. 

C. Dear Person Who Took Their Kids to the Park- Sorry we like...i dunno, "traumatized" you child? WTF are you all doing at a park at midnight/1 AM? You brought your kid to meet with your crack dealer??? We didn't traumatize your kid, it's probably no different than what he/she sees at home. So screw you, hypocrite. 

D. Sorry Spidey. I'm sorry my friend keeps calling you every time we get drunk. You're the only one of my friends from school she knows so she calls you every time. Okay, not every time, but too many times. I apologize. Also, I apologize for her trying to convince you to drive 2.5 hrs at 2 AM to come drink with us. Ooops. But, FYI, it would've been fucking amazing. 

There are a lot more people I should be apologizing to. I can't remember half the shit that went down, and, to be honest, I'm glad. There's a reason I don't drink tequila very often. Shit tends to get crazy. Buuuuuuut....I'd rather apologize afterwards and have the fun than not do it at all.

So until the next round of (In)Sincerest Apologies (a.k.a. Monday), 

Have fun and Don't Get Caught!